Self-sabotage

We’ve all done it. Made the commitments to ourselves and within a couple days, or 2-3 weeks time we end up making an excuse and failing to complete that one thing we first dedicated ourself to achieving.

Why do we do this!? Isn’t it frustrating? We want to lose 20 pounds so badly, so we know that we need to diet, and 2 days in we give in to that greasy cheeseburger. We want to get physically fit and start working out daily. 2 weeks in, we are sore and tired and tell ourselves- “1 day off will be okay.” And then….we never pick it back up. At least that is until the next time we try to make this commitment again.

My goal is to be debt-free. Yep. You heard it. I have had this goal for the last 5 years. (Yes, 5 freaking years) Free from credit card debt. I pay off one card, and then all of a sudden I feel like I made a little progress and it all goes to crap after that. You feel me on this? I can’t be the only one. What in the heck are we doing to ourselves???

I have come to terms with the fact that this is an issue. Whatever that goal is that we are trying to achieve we are SUPER motivated in the beginning. We tell ourselves, our partners, friends, and family members, the person walking down the street what we are going to do. Then a couple weeks or months go by and we somehow don’t have that same level of motivation to continue, and that commitment somehow slowly disappears into the abyss.

After researching why the majority of us can never become debt free, keep the weight off, or achieve our dreams; I have figured out a couple of deep-rooted items that cause us to sway off course and how to get back on track:

  1. Our motivation is highest at the Beginning of our commitment/goal. We expect that specific level of motivation and excitement to continue on throughout the entire experience. And let me tell you ladies and gentlemen, that is most definitely not the case.
  2. When our motivation starts dwindling we start making up excuses or procrastinate and do other things instead of getting down and dirty and getting right to it. I hate admitting this, because this has been my life. But, the first step is Awareness…second step is CHANGE!
  3. When we now become aware that our motivation is low, and our excuses in our head start popping up, we need to stop and think about our WHY. Why did you make this commitment? Why did you set this goal? Why are you losing the motivation now from when you first did it? Don’t make excuses, own up to it and be honest with yourself. You wanted this for a reason, so tell yourself the hard truth, and get some of that motivation back!
  4. When you have created a goal to become say, debt free, and you are slowly feeling like you’re getting no-where you probably are looking at too big of a picture. We humans like to feel like we have achieved something in our lives! We like to see that our work has paid off. Instead of looking at the $20,000 total debt, break it down into small attainable chunks. Chunks small enough that you know you CAN achieve them by a certain date. Not a “if I give all my energy at 110% can I hit this goal”, but a realistic tiny goal. Ex: I will reduce my debt by $1000 within 2 months by cutting out extras and using that towards my credit card payment on top of the minimum owed. Say What? I reduced it by $1500? Oh yeah, baby! I got this! You feel on top of the world just by going over your small goal. You are now reinvigorated to keep going for the next small goal and do it over and over again!
  5. 10% is motivation. 90% becomes habit. For some reason most of us have a magical power of picking up a bad habit more quickly than a good one. We don’t even know we are doing it, until all of a sudden you realize it’s an issue. Good habits, you are typically self-aware of and focus on them day in and day out.

So, this my friend, is the hardest part. We have to remind ourself whether we want to or not, that we have a WHY for this goal. On those days where we could be doing something else, we have to push through, bite the bullet and just get it over with. You want this! YOU CAN DO IT! DON’T GIVE UP! Don’t let yourself down one more time. Make yourself and your goals a priority, and feel the sense of accomplishment, freedom, and easy-breathing that comes at the end of your goal. You are important and you deserve to give yourself that relief and happiness. Don’t let the lack of motivation kill your dreams! Force it into a habit so that you can get to the finish line!!